And I'm 30

I’m not even a week into my latest decade and I feel really good about it- and it’s no wonder why.

My birthday has reminded me of the love that surrounds me- both my friends and my family, and some of those people overlap because they are so close that they really are my chosen family. I know it sounds silly, but getting over a hundred Facebook birthday wishes makes a girl feel good. I know it doesn’t take much effort to write two words on someone’s wall, but still, the simple thought that was given by each of my FB friends was so lovely. And the text messages too. My phone never stopped chiming all day. I think my coworkers were annoyed, but they got over it.

My dear friend, Missy had a baby 3 weeks before my birthday. She is a new mom- at home all day with her baby boy. She admitted to me a week or so ago that her 4th of July plans consisted of going to Walmart for diapers. She and her husband Tim have been totally enthralled in new parenthood- all the while entertaining guests that show up to visit baby Corey. It’s been busy and quite sleepless at their house. Nonetheless, Missy proved herself to be among the most thoughtful people I know. Not only did she send me a gift and card, but it was a few days early. I did not in any way expect a gift- I assumed her shopping time and ability was pretty limited, but her heart of gold proved itself again, and I found myself overwhelmed by her kindness.

My friends spent this weekend celebrating with me. Friday night Steve reserved space on the patio of Selwyn Pub and even despite inclement weather, my friends were all there- huddled under their umbrellas and toasting to the big 3-0 and eating my purple polka-dot cake with yellow candles. Saturday was spent aboard a pontoon boat with 10 fabulous people- honoring the birthday of myself, Katie, and Allison- who all turn 30 this month. We floated and frolicked and spiked snow cones with vodka J My friends were super generous in so many ways- with gifts and the most kind expressions I could ask for- both in words and in their presence.

And last not but certainly not least, Steve was on his game. And I say that with a lot of pride. For all of his strengths and talents, he can sometimes be a little lackadaisical on the planning front, which can sometimes frustrate me as I am such an over planner. But he didn’t disappoint. In fact, he impressed me. From surprise dinner at the McNinch House, to a gorgeous bouquet of flowers sent to my desk, to gifts that I adore, to hiring his interns to make me pineapple upside down cake, to arranging the party at Selwyn Pub and funding the entire week he was a fab planner- and the work he put into making my week special was amazing. I feel beyond blessed to have a partner who has shown me such a special birthday. I look forward to spending many more with him- I just hope the stress of planning for the planner doesn’t drive him crazy.

Normally, after my birthday I feel the same letdown that comes on December 26th. You know- the fun is over, the magic is gone and here we are, back to the mundane life- with a few more sweaters. This year I am feeling differently. Perhaps its because August is shaping up to be interesting- with vacation to Pittsburgh, Charleston, and fast approaching surgery that I am looking quite forward to. Part of me knows that these reasons have some part in my continual state of happiness, but I also think there comes a sense of contentment with where I am in life. It’s not as if this happened overnight on July 5th, but I am way more focused on what I have in front of me- and the importance of living in the moment than I have been before.

Yes, my planning side would love to fixate on the next steps in life- afterall, there are some possible milestones around the corner. But, I’m really not. I’m really enjoying today- Monday. I’m thanking God for this moment right now. I am happy thinking about eating dinner with Steve and living our pretty uneventful life together- with Mabel and Cody. I’m happy thinking about the simplicity of now and taking in each day of 30 one at a time.

It was and is a very happy birthday.

A Reflection on #639create

I just got home from the last class of Creativity and Innovation for the semester, and not to my surprise, I am feeling inspired. The passion, the enthusiasm, the support experienced in this class is unlike any educational experience I have ever been part of. I'm still teary eyed from the last 20 minutes of class. Truth be told, I cried the whole way home in my car.

As a class, we are a motley crew. We vary in age, life experience, spiritual belief, political viewpoint, lifestyle, and career background. We recognize, even celebrate these differences. We accept each other's truths and can see our own as "small t" truths as well. Our identities are neither right or wrong- none are concrete, or defined by one aspect of what makes me me or you you. We are uniquely ourselves, shared through our personal narratives; expressed through our own words; and lived through our passions, but somehow among this sea of diverse life, we have built a beautiful community here.

We learn together and grow together. We applaud one another. We rally each other's spirits. We offer constructive feedback and encouragement. We are ALL teachers and students in this classroom.

I've not an artistic bone in my body and generally avoid making a fool of myself by drawing stick figures. However, for some reason when surrounded by the safety net of these people, my inner artist is unleashed. I create art.

Group exercise classes make me incredibly self-conscious. What if I do it wrong? What if I sweat through my shorts? What if my face gets beet red? None of these thoughts cross my mind when I am in the company of this group. I am centered.

Wait, that's a lie- I was concerned about sweating, but I think that was a universal issue for the class :)

#639create exemplifies what makes the MA OComm. program truly special. It's about us. It's about an experience that enlightens new possibilities. It offers us each a voice and platform to share our stories. It challenges what we thought we knew. It pushes us to think differently. It makes us curious. It opens doors we didn't even know existed.

Life is a journey. We are constantly reminded by life's twists of fate that we still have growth to do- lessons to learn and words to share. This portion of my life's journey is amazing. I want to freeze time. I want to keep learning from these people, who have been kind and brave enough to share themselves with me. They are awesome teachers- and I have enjoyed being the student.

Next year at this time, I will be done with this program. Hopefully, the tweeting and the blogs live on and keep us connected, but the in-person experience shared twice a week with this motley crew of communicators will come to an end. It's hard to wrap my head around it, and I almost don't want to think about it out of fear of crying (for the third time in an hour)

Before taking #639create, I thought a lot about the year ahead in terms of where I will be professionally. Will I be promoted? Will my salary increase? Will I feel more rewarded by my work? I have thought about my personal life. I have wondered if I will be engaged- even possibly married. I have pondered what house I will be living in. What neighborhood might be home... how long my commute will be to work everyday. I have a lot of variables at play in all the areas of my life. But, sometime between May 16, 2011 and tonight, I have found myself counting down the classes left before I graduate...not in anticipation, but in curiosity of what that will mean for me. What's on the other side of this experience? Suddenly, I'm not so concerned with the other variables. I am more concerned with the me I will be without this community. Who will I be when I have to end this part of my journey?

In the midst of my car ride home tonight, while wiping tears and managing the windshield wipers, my Ipod shuffled to a song that seemed to uncannily embody so much of the things we talked about in #639create....our personal doubt and confronting fear. It was the perfect end to the night- an anthem that tells a narrative of not letting limitations keep you from soaring. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Snake Balls

Something terrible happened. On Sunday afternoon, after a productive morning of cleaning and running errands, I was abruptly disturbed by an odor like none other….MOTH BALLS. It is perhaps, a more offensive odor than any other that I know of. I happened to be swapping out my winter wardrobe with my summer wardrobe- and I assumed that my summer clothes that were in storage somehow sponged up the awful scent while in the attic. Gross. The only thing grosser was the realization that the smell wasn’t in fact a product of my seasonal storage.

On a side note and to provide some context, Steve is a little bit of a radical pest controller. We have had a few “instances” in the past involving a overly gregarious anti bug campaign that ended in the risk of asphyxiation of me and the dogs. I joke that he would like to wallpaper our house in fly paper, but it’s really on partially a joke. I really think he might do it, if left to his own devices.

So, why should I be surprised when I realize that the pungent smell of old people’s closets was not from our closet, but from our cellar- from snake repellent that my boyfriend, Mr. Orkin insisted on using. Dr. T’s Snake Away is a product that he insisted on purchasing about a month ago, after a report that the snake population is on the rise this summer. As an advocate of the environment, I usually put up a fight for NOT using chemicals- especially in our home and yard. After reading and researching to learn that Dr. T’s is TOTALLY harmless, I gave in. After all, I hate snakes- and the thought of Mabel or Cody facing off with a copper head terrifies me.

All would have been well had Steve not decided to de-snake the cellar- the unfinished cave under our house where our furnace, hot water tank, and garden tools reside. Has a snake ever been seen there? No. Do we frequently go in the cellar? No. Do I care if snakes are in there- not really…so long as they don’t travel upstairs into our living quarters. Well, I am not sure if that is possible, but I can attest that fumes from Snake Away- that smell EXACTLY like moth balls do in fact travel upstairs. My clothes are absorbing the scent- and I AM walking around smelling like an 88 year old.

Ironically, just hours before the “snake out” on Sunday, Steve and I were at Target buying cleaning supplies and a bevy of scented candles, diffusers, Glade plug-ins, etc to eliminate the dog scent from our house. Needless to say, I would rather smell Cody’s stinky ears a hundred times over Edna and Harold’s eau du clo-set.

I have been googling home remedies for getting rid of the obnoxious scent. I read that white vinegar absorbs it. I have places bowls of it everywhere. If anyone knows of any other suggestions, please let me know. I am living with the fear that I will smell like this- forever. HELP.

On a total side note, I have a blog entry I am waiting to finish about Savannah. I have to upload the pics to my new MAC BOOK PRO J so that the blog is complete. Hopefully, I can do that soon. My summer semester of grad school begins tonight. It’s going to be a CRAZY 6 weeks, but once I am through, I get the rest of the summer to unwind and escape from academia for a little bit. I will survive- as long as I don’t have to smell like an old person.

Divine Secrets of the Taste Off Sisterhood

After a girlfriend draught of over a month, my friends and I decided early in March to begin a weeknight dinner tradition once a month, to secure girl time and avoid elongated feelings of separation. You see, in the past year a lot has changed for all of us…careers, living arrangements, living locations, relationships, priorities, etc. However, amidst the newness of our worlds, we never intend there to be a stretch of time when we are so disconnected.

As I had eluded to in previous entries, 2010 was a year of learning for me in the friendship department. I figured that by the time I graduated high school I was done with most of my friendship lessons, but I was clearly wrong. And, I have been reminded of this several times (thinking back to a squabble over our 10 yr high school reunion in 2009). Anyway, the last thing I want to do is to build barriers between myself and my friends. Sometimes, situations change and it can’t be helped, but in this scenario with challenges of new apartments, schedules, and boyfriends I knew we could work around our situational conditions. So, last night was our second “Taste Off”- named for our style of sharing tapas, or many small plates, wine, and dessert. We dined at Soul Gastrolounge and we each got a few bites of many items. And, while the tuna sashimi tacos and fried goat cheese bruscetta were being passed and sampled, we caught up on each others’ lives.

Last night we had a full agenda. I went so far as to email our talking points out earlier in the day, to ensure we don’t miss anything critical. Our lineup last night went as follows:

1. Lauren- Updates on Linda being “on the loose”… and in Charlotte with Lauren

2. Katie- Meth Mom antics- yesterday’s event of catching the M.M “rolling around in the DSS parking lot

with a boy on top of her”.

3. Adrienne- Yesterday’s bombing

4. MB- Updates on her Charleston travels and spring break in NYC.

We managed to cover all of the listed topics, and even venture on to additional items like pregnancy announcements via an emailed ultra sound photo, MTV’s Teen Mom, the stalking of Brad Womack and Emily Maynard among other subject matter rich in pop culture and social trending. The food was brought out one dish after the next while we bee-bopped from topic to topic effortlessly. We even mastered our segues perfectly.

All in all, it might be my favorite day of the month. Believe me, I ADORE my date nights with Steve…and any night with Steve really, but time with my girls is so refreshing. Sometimes (in the long weeks in between Taste Offs), I feel like I have been ostracized from these people who were once my partners in crime- my partners in everything. Not so long ago we were an army of single gals- spending almost every weekend together and constantly planning our social activities around one another. Now, I find myself spending most weekends at home (which I totally enjoy), or with Steve’s friends, many of whom can’t get themselves out of bars and into domesticity. Hopefully, the weeknight tapas retreats will allow us not only to stay connected, but to work towards plugging in more play dates. Successfully, we have already added a karaoke night on to the calendar for next Saturday night. Additionally, we are in the process of planning a summer weekend trip to Charleston. I was still digesting my goat cheese while already looking forward to next month’s meeting.

I am going to try to take pics at our next meeting- of friends and food. Between the mouth-watering cuisine and our non-stop smiles and laughter, it's a logical time for photos.

In other events, my spring break (2 weeks off) from school has come to an end. The semester is winding down and I just registered for my summer class (2 nights a week). This coming weekend I am meeting Jill for a very belated birthday breakfast at the Flying Biscuit. Steve and I are going to spend Sunday with his Dad and Step Mom. I have implemented a good exercise regimen into my days. The past few I have been slacking, but I vow to get back on the calorie burning wagon- especially considering the Taste Off indulgences.

2 Bed, 1 Bath, plenty of memories

The act of selling things has never been my forte. Seriously, I am not "salesy". There are certain people (like Steve) who can charm the money right out of a stranger's wallet and into the purchase of any product or service.

Currently we have our house and my car on the market. Hopefully both items will sell themselves, but neither is ideal. Both are older and have flaws…flaws that have come to add character, but I don’t know that a stranger will appreciate them like I do.

As for the house, it’s small, it’s not in the best part of town, and it needs some repairs. What’s it got going for it? A huge fenced in backyard (which is what I will miss more than anything)- a third floor begging to be finished as the master bedroom, beautiful hardwood floors, nice neighbors and good memories of the beginning of the life that Steve and I share together, under one roof. I can recall the early days of our courtship (although that makes it sound pretty formal) and sitting in his place thinking “wow, this place could be so much nicer”. It wasn’t long until I had covered the porch in potted flowers and spruced up the garden with lavender and other perennials.

Just a few weeks later, I talked Steve into a “surface makeover”. One Saturday he had to work, but he armed me with his Home Depot card and sent me off to the hardware store to buy paint and other supplies. *Side note, I LOVE hardware stores- the smell, the sights of people full of determination and optimism to undertake projects *
I came back with a half a dozen cans of paint in a few colors, rollers, tape, drop cloths, and all the other essentials.

Assuming as a man Steve knew how to paint, I thought he could just get to the taping and trim without any issue. It was then he confessed he had never really painted. The next month was a LONG laborious month of transforming 6 out of seven rooms from bland dingy off-white to soothing beige, green, and cream. Eventually, we finished…and Steve got his first lesson in the evils of painting.

Once the walls were bright and baseboards and trim were cleanly anew, I twisted Steve’s arm to go furniture shopping. We are complete shopping opposites. A. He doesn’t like to shop B. He only shops online C. He researches EVERYTHING before making a purchase. I shop on impulse, spend too much, and need to see and feel my overpriced unnecessary items before buying.

Thankfully, Rooms To Go was holding the deal in which they throw in a 48 inch plasma TV with the purchase of any room. This sealed the deal for him. We found a chocolate brown corduroy set with matching TV stand, tables, and lamps (the lamps were heinous- they currently sit in the attic). Neither of us was in love with the set at first, however, it was uber comfy- the couch was nice and over sized and the chair and a half with ottoman screamed for our attention.

Little by little, the house which was in January 2010 a barren bachelor pad had become our little home. It wasn’t perfect- and still isn’t. I would change 45 things about it if I could, but I would never change the time and experiences it gave us together. Remodeling is stressful for any couple, with very few issues we sprung into it together and grew as a couple. Steve saw my obsessive planning, aversion to rest, and nagging come to the surface. I was introduced to his lack of handyman skills (though he has improved over the year) and his need for rest breaks. Somehow, despite our differences in shopping and home projects we accomplished what we set out to do.

We are both looking forward to living somewhere with more closet space, in a safer area, and saving some money from the hefty mortgage we currently have, but I can’t look forward without looking back with fondness at the little home that watched us learn to cohabitate and colored our first year as a couple.

While the Cat is Away...

Ahhh, it's a beautiful Saturday morning...sunny and 65 degrees at 11am. I have already enjoyed some QT with the dogs, walking, going for coffee, and giving dirty little Mabel a much needed bath. Most mornings I spend laying in bed until at least 9am- eeking out every minute of being lazy that I can. This weekend is a little different.

Steve left for Texas on Thursday. It's bittersweet to have him gone. Sometimes a few days apart can be refreshing. It gave me a chance to get some really good spring cleaning done...I scoured the bathroom, dusted the ceiling fans and baseboards, and rid the house of a layer of filth. It felt cathartic to wake up this morning to a really clean house. There is no clutter, the backdoor is open and I am enjoying a nice early spring breeze. I also took the opportunity to watch a chick flick last night- Life as We Know It.

I had wanted to see it, and it was sweet, but pretty unrealistic. The thought of losing a best friend in a tragic accident is overwhelming- much less adopting their toddler too. The characters were a little to optimistic for most of the movie. Being that last night was the first Friday of Lent, I also was in need of a non-meat meal, which doesn't appeal much to Steve- or any man. I found some good looking pre-made tilapia in Harris Teeter. To my disappointment, it lacked flavor. However, I did indulge in a piece of German chocolate cake, which made up for the bland entree. Good thing I have been diligent about my workout routine- allowing Jillian Michaels and Denise Austin to kick my butt every day via DVD.

Today is Charlotte's annual St Patrick's bar crawl. My friends and I are all partaking and I am excited to carry out a tradition we have been part of for several years- and it's not often that we see each other any more, so just the thought of being together is great. I'm looking very forward to toasting with green beer and quoting the Mobile Alabama leprechaun- our patron Saint of St Patrick's Day. Pat may have driven the snakes out of Ireland, but the leprechaun has given us YEARS worth of humor.

On the flip side to Steve being out of town, sleeping alone is strange. And, I am not the only one to notice. Mabel was unable to relax with her obviously absent father figure with us. Once in her crate, she settled down, but sleeping in bed with me, she was restless. Last night I hardly got any sleep. I don't know if it was because I was alone, or because my allergy medicine had me buzzing.

Tomorrow I am going to visit Melia and her new baby, Zoey. She was born in March, and I have only seen her for a mere 2 minutes, so I am long overdue for a visit with the new little one. I am also hoping to score some church time, being that we are into Lent.

Speaking of, I decided to make the very difficult decision to give up Facebook for Lent. This is the first year in awhile that I am feeling really challenged. It's strange to be disconnected, but a little liberating. Why do I need to know what my old roommate's ex boyfriend is doing, or what my old boss' husband is feeling about the Daytona 500. There is something nice about simplicity- and not being wired to the events of over 600 people is nice and simple. I am sure by Easter I will be ready to reconnect, but for the next 35 days, I will take advantage of the disconnect.

In the meantime, I just have to make it another 3 days and I have my boyfriend back- which is WAY more exciting than Facebook, but until then I am going to enjoy some single me time with my dogs, my friends, and myself...and a nice clean house :)

On a total side note- and not to under shadow the importance of it, my thoughts and prayers are with those in Japan recovering from the tsunami and earthquake devastation. An 8.9 earthquake is unbelievable! I can't imagine. The footage is insane- especially of the tsunami. The cars and boats look like bath tub toys being tossed around the Japanese country-side. I just can't fathom enduring that kind of event. I will say that if any country can handle it, Japan can. They are leaps and bounds ahead of the rest of the world with their technology designed to respond to natural disasters- and they are a resilient people. Nonetheless, I am sending thoughts for peace and recovery.

NOLA News

Happy Friday! I have a good deal of catch up to play since my last entry. We made our trip to New Orleans last week. Wow. It was a great time. Steve and I needed a few days to enjoy one another and escape the distractions of work and life. Mabel's original foster Mom, Patti offered to babysit her for us and Adam adopted Cody for a few days. I can't thank either of them enough for their kindness and care. I am an over-protective mother, and I cannot relax on vacation knowing my kids aren't in good hands. Huge thanks to Patti & Adam!

So the trip was tons of fun...too much so at one point. We arrived Thursday afternoon, eager to explore and emerge ourselves in the Cajun culture. We first filled our bellies with Po Boys from Mike Serio's- a local institution probably more well known for the owners college sports obsession and connections than the food. The sandwiches were decent, but the company in this little shop was the memorable part. Mike and Steve bonded over the expansive collection of college football helmets hanging around the shop. All the while, a severely drunken patron- or friend of the owner staggered around running his mouth- and profusley bleeding from a wound to his ankle that went unrecognized by anyone but us. Needless to say, it put a damper on my appetite, but it was an experience. We headed for the River Walk where we got fudge and strolled next to the Mississippi.


Thursday night we found ourselves on Bourbon Street. It was overwhelming...and tacky beyond belief. We started at a bar called the Back Door that had live music and strong drinks. I had my first hurricane- and it went down easy, too easy! After a couple of drinks there, we strolled to Pat O'Brien's for their famous hurricane. It tasted similar, but was served in a much larger glass. By the time I finished that cocktail, I was good an tipsy. It would be at this time that in Charlotte I would cut myself off, but when in Rome...

I woke up in the morning (not feeling like P Diddy) with an atrocious hangover. The previous night's events started to surface. I may or may not have taken several test tube shots. We may or may not have decided to go to a strip club. I may or may not have befriended a stripper named Dez. I may or may not have thrown up in a box on Bourbon Street while Steve ate hot dogs. Damn hurricanes.

Friday started out rough for me- I was weak, achy, and fighting a gruesome hangover all day. I rallied after a McDonalds breakfast sandwich and we decided t take the streetcar down St Charles to the Garden District. The bumpy ride and the breeze through the open windows were just what I needed. It was a gorgeous day so we strolled around Audubon Park, enjoying the spanish moss and glorious southern foliage.

We had a great creole dinner (I can't remember the name of the restaurant) and cocktails at Pirate's Alley. I of course was still on the mend, so I nursed mine slowly and only had one. We took an evening carriage ride. Our tour guide, Jose was quite possibly the world's worst story teller, but it was a nice scenic ride.

Saturday we began our day with a swamp tour of the honey island swamp. I have a slight obsession with gators, so my excitement for seeing them in the wild was unbridled. Unfortunately, the water was too cold for them, so we only caught a glimpse of one for a quick second. But the other swamp creatures (turtles, birds, etc) were neat. And, the flora and fauna- and natives were also really interesting. Following the tour, the owner was nice enough to bring out a captive baby gator and I got to hold her. They are magnificent animals.
Once back from the bayou (it was about 45 min away), we took a much needed nap and then spent Saturday just walking around, watching street performers, and eventually catching the kickoff Mardi Gras parade, Krewe du Vieux. It was cool, but as a claustrophobic person, it was insane.

Sunday we got a really good breakfast, relaxed, shopped, got our fill of oysters on the half shell and took a walking ghost tour. This time our tour guide was awesome. She was perfectly eccentric and intelligent. We heard some great tales of horrors from hundreds of years ago, including the Delphine LaLaurie story. So cool!

Our trip adjourned on Monday, which was welcomed by both of us. Steve had limited internet access there and it was killing him. Our feet where achy and we had had our fill of seafood. All in all, it was a great time for both of us! I have found a love of beignets and the saying "Who Dat"

We quickly got back into the swing of things- selling a house, going to school, work, etc. Life is busy! Weekends are very welcomed, however, it seems even Saturday and Sunday are hectic right now.

Tonight the two of us are taking a road trip to Raleigh to see the Penguins play the Hurricanes. We went last year and it was one of our first experiences as a couple. We decided at that point to make it a tradition, so here we are again :) GO PENS!

Tomorrow, if the weather is nice I would like to take the dogs for a long walk, maybe organize the attic, and grill out. I think the chore list for getting the house on the market will dominate the next month or so, but it will be well worth it when we have our new place!